"When arguing with a stupid person, make sure he isn't doing the same thing."
"Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today.
If you wait until tomorrow, they will have either taxed it or made it illegal."
"Flattery is soft soap-and soft soap is 80% lye."
"The best thing about dictating a letter is that you can use words that you don't know how to spell."
"Sometimes what looks like a light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train"
"A 4-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant"
"The only thing harder than sticking to a diet is keeping quiet about it"
"No one feels worse than the person who gets sick on his day off."
"Teenagers express a burning desire to be different by all dressing alike."
"An egotist is a self-made man who insists on giving everyone else the recipe."
"Sometimes what looks like a light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train"
"A 4-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant"
"The only thing harder than sticking to a diet is keeping quiet about it"
"No one feels worse than the person who gets sick on his day off."
"Teenagers express a burning desire to be different by all dressing alike."
"An egotist is a self-made man who insists on giving everyone else the recipe."
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